Sunday, April 25, 2010

World Order Restored

Albert Pujols is once again batting .300 or better.
The Cardinals first baseman ended a bit of a slump that dropped his average below the "good hitter's" mark for three days with a 3-for-4 performance, including a home run, in a 2-0 win Sunday.
Prior to this week it had been more than two years since the slugger's average sat below .300.
Pujols is currently batting .301 with 7 homers and 17 RBI in 18 games this season.

Few Quick Draft Notes

(Photo courtesy of NFL.com)

The Houston Texans have an affinity for Wisconsin Badger tight ends. Already rostering Owen Daniels, the Texans selected Garrett Graham in the fourth round (118th overall).

Defensive end O'Brien Schofield was the only other Wisconsin Badger selected, taken by the Arizona Cardinals toward the end of the fourth round.

Former teammates and roommates remained inseparable during the draft. Texas wide receiver Jordan Shipley went 84th overall to the Cincinnati Bengals and quarterback Colt McCoy went a pick later to the Cleveland Browns, a divisional rival.

One Tim Toone, a bite-sized (5-10, 175) wide receiver out of Weber State, had the distinction of being the last selected in the 2010 draft. He went to the Lions at No. 255 overall.

Saturday, April 24, 2010

Just Doesn't Make Sense

(Courtesy of NBC Sports)

Brad Childress is either not a man or a delusional one.
A legitimate franchise quarterback painfully waited for anyone to come to his aid, just as the the beaten Jewish traveler in the Parable of the Good Samaritan had. Like the priest and Levite, the Vikings approached and looked the other way, before moving on.
Jimmy Clausen could have been the next face of the Vikings franchise.
In a perfect world Brett Favre would return for a year to play out his contract. He would mentor and groom the former Fighting Irish signal-caller who would then be ready to ditch the training wheels and drive the Vikings on his own.
It made perfect sense.
And as fate seemed to have it, Clausen slipped to where the Vikings could make him theirs. If not Clausen, Texas' Colt McCoy was there, too.
The football gods liked Minnesota after all -- retribution for the heart-wrenching Super Bowl losses, 1998 and last year's NFC Championship Game.
All would have been forgiven but for Minnesota's coach.
Childress fell in love with Tarvaris Jackson, a D-IAA quarterback from Alabama State, in 2006. The Vikings selected him with the 64th overall pick.
Through the mistakes, poor decisions and self-confidence concerns Chilly has stuck by Jackson.
He said he was content to start T-Jack should Favre decide to retire.
Not sure what game tape he has been watching the past four years.
That's the statement of a madman.
Or someone who isn't man enough to admit he made a mistake.
Either way, it has once again left the proximate fate of the Minnesota Vikings at the mercy of an indecisive future Hall of Famer.

Unfamiliar Territory


Albert Pujols is a great player.
He sets the bar for consistency every year, hitting around .330 with averages of 41 home runs and 120 RBI.
When I saw his average dip below .300 following an 0-for-5 game Wednesday versus Arizona and subsequently drop further in the two games since, I decided to hit the books; when was the last time Pujols' average sat below .300 at day's end prior to this recent stretch?
Turns out you have to go all the way back to Opening Day, April 1, 2008 -- a span of 321 games.
Take the historical timeline back further -- to June 12, 2007, 436 games -- for the last time his average sat below the .300 mark for three consecutive days.
Now that's just ridiculous.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

Steelers to Keep Big Ben

So much for the hope that the two-time Super Bowl champion would be joining the Minnesota Vikings.
The Purple and Gold desperately need a franchise quarterback regardless of whether Brett Favre returns for a 20th season. Pittsburgh's discontent with its star seemed like the perfect opportunity to land one.
Alas, the Steelers plan on keeping their signal-caller and helping him through his thirst for partying and (quite possibly) women.
The news isn't surprising. As disappointing as the off-field news has been and the team's 2009 season was, Big Ben is one helluva player. He is one of a handful of quarterbacks with two Super Bowls to his credit and is arguably the best there is in the league in the final two minutes of a game (think Super Bowl XLIII and last season versus the Packers).
All the best teams in the league have a sturdy if not stellar option at the game's most coveted position.
Even in the face of criticism and disappointment, Pittsburgh wasn't going to give up on its chance at redemption.
Facing a six game suspension, there's time now for Roethlisberger to make good to his employer, too.

Course Work

You'll find a few commercials I have written from a copywriting class to follow. Enjoy.

Auto Show :60

(Mx: medium-paced rock with accentuated drum beats throughout spot)

(Sfx: Car revving for four seconds) Think power. Think performance. Think comfort. Think economy. Think whatever you want! The biggest car show in Minnesota has got you covered. The Twin Cities Auto Show! From Ford and Chevrolet to Lexus and Acura – almost every car manufacturer in the world will be offered! This year’s featured ride: the 2010 Ford Taurus. The Taurus is all new and faster than ever with a 263-horse power, three-point-five-liter V-six engine. Get your license to dream at the Twin Cities Auto Show! Adults 10 bucks. Kids 10 and younger get in FREE. Save $2.00 off the price of admission when you shop online … Twin-Cities-Auto-Show-dot-com. Cash for Clunkers may be gone, but the chance to make a clean break from your sputtering beater is not. While you’re there, register to win five-thousand-dollars toward the purchase of a new car… Twin-Cities-Auto-Show-dot-com. The Twin Cities Auto Show rolls into town at the Minneapolis Convention Center beginning Saturday March 6th. Think big! (Jingle: Gotta Go to the Auto Show).


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Gardner Hardware Co. :30

(Mx: easy listening throughout) Before a Minneapolis skyline replete with sprawling buildings, a small hardware store stood serving the needs of the community. The city’s landscape has changed dramatically since. Businesses have opened up shop and shut down. Through it all, Gardner Hardware Company has remained a constant symbol of reliability, quality and service for household products. Gardner Hardware Company is among the oldest family owned hardware stores in Minneapolis. Located in the Warehouse District. Gardner Hardware Company, serving you since 1884.

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Hagstrom Hotels :60

(Mx: slow dramatic music) Life teaches many lessons. It just depends on whether you’re willing to listen. More importantly, learn. It wasn’t too long ago Hagstrom Hotels suffered through some unnecessary tough times and contentious public scrutiny. More importantly, so did you. (Mx: crossfades to livelier music) Rather than sit idly by and deflect blame, Hagstrom Hotels took action. Beginning from the ground up, Hagstrom Hotels renovated and upgraded its image to accommodate you – with a remodeled lobby and expanded veranda overlooking the bluffs at Fort Snelling along the majestic Mississippi River to the highest rotating rooftop café and spa in Minnesota. Hagstrom Hotels also meticulously and concertedly increased safety every step of the way. Make your reservation today at Hagstrom-Hotels-dot-com. When you book now, get a complimentary meal to the rooftop café and a $25.00 gift card to Mall of America. That’s Hagstrom-Hotels-dot-com… Hagstrom Hotels learned from the tough times and is reconnecting with you. Trust in Hagstrom Hotels (Mx: fades out).



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First Avenue :60

Experience music like you never have before. Come to First Avenue. It’s the Mecca of music in the Twin Cities. Right away you’ll be immersed in a total musical experience. Look around. Etched into the walls are the symbols of dreams realized for after school garage bands. Or reverie just begun. First Avenue is a launching pad for anyone seeking the big time. Bands such as Atmosphere and Soul Asylum came through the landing and flew to the top. And to think, all this is done just for your entertainment… only at First Avenue. Every night someone is performing. See for yourself online at first-avenue-dot-com. This Saturday City Pages presents Too Much to Love… live from the mainroom starting at 10:00. Eighteen-plus. Cover is three bucks at the door. Visit first-avenue-dot-com for additional information about upcoming events and tickets. Swing by First Avenue to experience music to the max. And get your groove on while you’re at it. First Avenue. What a music club should be.


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What Else Bubba May Have Said

Benjamin Buford Blue knew everything there was to know about the shrimping business.
In the film "Forrest Gump," he listed ways to prepare, and dishes that contained, the tasty crustaceans over the span of several different day-night shots. Because the filmmakers didn't want to bore the audience, Bubba only recited about a dozen or so.
I took the liberty of trying to fill some of the void with other shrimp creations.
Here's a list of what I came up with (includes those mentioned in the movie).

  • boiled
  • broiled
  • baked
  • fried
  • stir-fried
  • popcorn
  • breaded
  • shrimp with pasta (mind you, there are more than 365 types of noodles, making this list much longer)
  • shrimp sandwiches
  • shrimp burgers
  • shrimp salad
  • shrimp on the barbie
  • shrimp and potatoes
  • shrimp soup
  • shrimp in a blanket
  • shrimp tacos
  • shrimp burritos
  • shrimp fajitas
  • shrimp enchiladas
  • shrimp chimichangas
  • grilled shrimp
  • blackened shrimp
  • frozen shrimp
  • shrimp chili
  • shrimp on flatbread
  • shrimp pizza
  • shrimp and eggs
  • Shrimp kebabs
  • barbecue shrimp
  • teriyaki shrimp
  • shrimp and pho noodles
  • shrimp eggrolls
  • shrimp and scallops
  • shrimp and steak
  • shrimp cocktail
  • a surf and turf with shrimp
  • butterfly shrimp
  • garlic shrimp
  • coconut shrimp
  • honey-glazed shrimp
  • beer-battered shrimp
By no means is this list all-inclusive. I'd say it would get Bubba through making his bed.
Add your shrimp dishes to this post at your leisure.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Big Ben to Vikings?

(Photo courtesy of SI)

Favre is nearly done
Vikes need franchise quarterback
Big Ben is best bet

(A Haggy Haiku)